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How long did it take you to write this essay? You have 40 minutes in IELTS Task 2.
Please run your essays through Microsoft Word before posting here to remove basic grammar and punctuation errors. Get rid of red and green underlines. Microsoft Word can really help you to improve your writing.
Here are a few points.
Word Choice/Word Form/Usage
- Now a days it is possible → Nowadays it is possible
- The information technology revolution has made every office work much more convenient and easy → The information technology revolution has made office work easier and more convenient.
- It is a controversial issues ,weather→ It is a controversial issue whether
- Put one space AFTER the punctuation mark (comma, period, full stop, exclamation mark, question mark). Do NOT put a space before the punctuation mark.
- Firstly, Working → do not have capitals in the middle of sentences except for names.
- Put one space between words and between sentences.
- It is a controversial issues ,weather it need to promote for the benefit of employer and worker or not . →
Is it better for employees to work from home? OR
What are some of the benefits for the employee and the employer? OR
Is working from home always a good idea? OR
Many people thinking working at home would be much better than having to travel to work. However, it....
- It help to cut down the workers travelling time to work .→ It cuts down commuting.
- fax machine facilities → fax
- the investment cost of a business → the cost of business
It is a controversial issues ,weather it need to promote for the benefit of employer and worker or not .
Don’t use “It is a controversial issue.” It’s overused.
In any case, deciding to work from home is not really a controversial issue. It's better to avoid all memorized phrases unless you memorize them correctly. Just say what you want to say, and don't try to remember a boring old phrase that you half-learned.
Another possible point ,work form home inhibit the interpersonal relationships of clients with workers and employers
This can be rewritten as
Another point is that working from home inhibits the development of relationships between workers and clients
- Working from home provide more leisure time → working from home provides more leisure time.
- It help to cut down. → It helps to cut down.
- Employer no need to spend money to build and maintain of office infrastructure. → The employer does not need to spend money on building or maintain offices.
These sentences are missing a verb →
- So ,team work only possible in office environment → So, team work is only is possible in an office environment
- .The only possible way that company can develop good relationships with their customers by arranging direct or face to face meeting with them, →The only possible way that companies can develop good relationships with their customers is by arranging face-to-face meetings with them.
- which totally impossible by using telephone calls and emails. → which is totally impossible using telephone or email.
Don’t start a sentence with 'although.' Don’t put a comma after 'although.' Don’t use ‘but’ in the same sentence as ‘although:’
Although, new information technology gave opportunity to employees and employers to work at home in spite of offices, but it involves some drawbacks as well which can hinder the growth of both worker and employer
This could be rewritten in TWO short separate sentences as:
New information technology gives employees and employers an opportunity to work at home and save time and money. However, it can hinder the productivity of both workers and companies due to weaker relationships between customers and colleagues.