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Is education a lifelong task?
Topic Rating: 0 Topic Rating: 0 Topic Rating: 0 Topic Rating: 0 Topic Rating: 0 Topic Rating: 0 (0 votes) 
May 26, 2012
9:53 pm
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Hi every one, there is 2 weeks left for me to practice ielts essays. So nervous. 😀

Education is a lifelong task. In what extent do you agree or disagree?

Along with life of human is always observation and learning. Some claim that people should use a certain period of their life to study while other believe we need to learn all the time. I personally agree with the latter view because education cultivate our knowledge acquisition and create meningful moments in life

There are some reasons for thinking that education is not a lifelong task. First, wonderful moments of childhood can be deprived if children are taught a great amount of knowledge. In stead of interacting with their peers, children have to learn many subjects which take almost their time. Secondly, after students finish their universities, career and family are prioritized first, rather than studying. Thirdly, the journey of learning should stop in our twilight years. During the rest years of life, it is time for human to take a rest instead of burdening their minds with knowledge.

On the other hand, education plays a crucial role at any age. To begin with, children can discover their talents at the early age if they receive suitable guidance. Thus, classes for infant priodigies are operated with the purpose of revealing and encouraging their talents. In addition, no sooner people go to work than they recognize that what they know is just a drop of the ocean. That is the reason why most big companies in the world annually spend a huge amount of money on training sessions for their employees. This help their staffs to keep-up with cutting-edge technologies and working changes. Furthermore, by the time people stop learning, the sense of boredom and uselessness creeps in. Steve Jobs who studied and researched to the last minute, felt no pain of his passing away. People only feel the true meaning of life when they are learning and doing something new.

To summarize, although people need to have leisure time, they definitely have to enhance their knowledge to adapt with restless changes in the world. It is education that partly makes the life of us meaningful.


May 27, 2012
8:26 am
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I saw great improvements in this essay with very few grammatical and spelling mistakes (only one spelling mistake in your essay). In addition, your structure is easy to understand with the many good examples and vocabulary. Keep up the good work!

However, I still want to give you some negative comments to improve your writing.

+ Maybe it should be better to change some of your sentences from passive to active to imrprove the clarity. However, I'm not quite sure so I did not make changes in your essay.

+ The word "pass away" and "thus" might not suitable in academic writing.

All the best.

 

"Along with life of human is always observation and learning (Human life is a period of learning and observation). Some (some people) claim that people should use (each individual should only use)  a certain period of their life to study while other (others) believe we need to learn all the time. I personally agree with the latter view because education cultivate our knowledge acquisition and create meningful (meaningful ) moments in life"


"There are some reasons for thinking that education is not a lifelong task. First, wonderful moments of childhood can be deprived if children are taught a great amount of knowledge. In stead (instead ) of interacting with their peers, children have to learn many subjects which take almost their time. Secondly, after students finish their universities, career and family are prioritized first, rather than studying. Thirdly, the journey of learning should stop in our twilight years. During the rest years of life, it is time for human to take a rest instead of burdening their minds with knowledge."

 

" On the other hand, (it is also understandable that ) education plays a crucial role at any age ( in all ages ). To begin with, children can discover their talents at the early age if they receive suitable guidance. Thus (Therefore), classes for infant priodigies (prodigies) are operated with the purpose of revealing and encouraging their talents. In addition, no sooner people go to work than they recognize that what they know is just a drop of the ocean. That is the reason why most big companies in the world annually spend a huge amount of money on training sessions for their employees. This help (helps ) their staffs to keep-up (keep up) with cutting-edge technologies and working changes. Furthermore, by the time people stop learning, the sense of boredom and uselessness creeps in. Steve Jobs (,) who studied and researched to (until ) the last minute, felt no pain of his passing away (dealth). People only feel the true meaning of life when they are learning and doing something new."

 

"To summarize, although people need to have leisure time, they definitely have to enhance their knowledge to adapt with restless changes in the world. It is education that partly makes the life of us meaningful (our lives more meaningful )".


May 27, 2012
6:43 pm
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Along with life of h Human beings have always been known as curious is always observers ation and learners ing. Some claim that people should use a certain period of their life to study while other believe we they need should to learn all the time. I personally agree with the latter view because life long education cultivates our knowledge acquisition and it creates meaningful moments in life.(Make sentences parallel like observers and learners, should learn etc.) 

 

There are some reasons for thinking that education is not a lifelong task. First, wonderful moments of childhood can be deprived if children are taught a great amount of knowledge. In stead of interacting with their peers, children have to learn many subjects which take almost their time. Secondly, after students finish their universities, career and family are prioritized first, rather than studying. Thirdly, the journey of learning should stop in our twilight years. During the rest years of life, it is time for human to take a rest instead of burdening their minds with knowledge.(The essay is not asking for it's effect so first reason does not have a strong link to topic : See this is a debatable essay which you can recognize with certain words like is ,are ,do question form; thus in this in this essay they were asking you is education a lifelong task ;"if yes why , if no why not" .So your second and third point are strong.)

 

On the other hand, education plays a crucial role at any in all stages of life age. To begin with, children can discover their talents at the an early age if they receive suitable guidance. Thus, classes for infant priodigies prodigies are operated with the purpose of revealing and encouraging their talents. In addition, no sooner do people who go to work than they recognize that what they know is just a drop of the ocean. That is the reason why most big companies in the world annually spend a huge amount of money on training sessions for their employees. This helps their staffs to keep-up with the cutting-edge technologies and working changes. Furthermore, by the time people stop learning, the a sense of boredom and uselessness creeps in. Steve Jobs who studied and researched to until the last minute, felt no pain of his passing away. People only feel the true meaning of life when they are learning and doing something new.

 

To summarize, although people need to have leisure time, they definitely have to enhance their knowledge to adapt with restless changes in the world. It is education that partly makes the life of us meaningful.

(You have good points,it seems you can do much better )

May 27, 2012
7:55 pm
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_ thanks Tommy Bui and anufrancis. 😀

 

_ you guys really help me to realize mistakes in my essay

 

_ @ anufrancis :In  my second paragraph , I think if we want to say about the idea " education is not a lifelong task" we need to mention about effects of learning too much in all ages. I think the two last points of my essay have those effects

May 27, 2012
9:26 pm
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guys, I want to add more a sentence in my conclusion.

 

" To summarize, although people need to have leisure time, they definitely have to enhance their knowledge to adapt with restless changes in the world. As there goes a saying " study, study more, study forever ", it is education that partly makes our lives more meaningful.

May 29, 2012
8:07 pm
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your new conclusion looks good. I like the way you use proverb to improve your writing.

May 31, 2012
3:40 pm
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Hi Emkoxinh!

Thanks to Tommy and to Anufrancis for helping with their comments. You have both made some very good suggestions.

I agree with Tommy's comment that your essays are much clearer. Your second and third paragraphs are clear, well-organized, and have lots of examples.

Both Anufrancis and Tommy had problems with the opening sentence: 

Along with life of human is always observation and learning.

You are trying hard - but perhaps it's better to keep it as simple as possible. The exam is not the time to experiment!  I like their suggestions. Maybe something like this might be good, too:

Observation and learning are an essential part of human life

I thought your nice short opening sentence for Paragraph 3 was great.

On the other hand, education plays a crucial role at any age.

I liked Anufrancis' fix for your last sentence:

Education makes our life meaningful.

It's now a very strong sentence and conclusion.

Anufrancis, I'm not too worried about Emkoxinh's second paragraph (the one you were worried about). I think the examples are OK! Don't worry too much about the wording of the question. The IELTS examiners are not trying to trick you. Just because there is a particular question word in the question does not mean you have to write your essay in a certain way.  Just get the main idea of the question and go for it. Of course, stay on topic!

Well done, everyone.

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