Welcome!

In the forum on this page you can see IELTS essays by people just like you. Hundreds of people added essays and comments and helped each other to get a great IELTS essay score! Have a look at their amazing writing!

Please note: This forum is closed!

closed

Sorry! However, please enjoy the hundreds of essays and thousands of comments still available here. A HUGE thanks to all the writers who commented and to all the visitors. We hope we've made IELTS writing less scary.

Popular Tags

Click the links below to see essays on that topic.

art business communication children crime culture economy education environment families food freedom globalization
health heritage  leisure media politics science society sports television travel technology transport university violence work

Avatar

Lost password?
Advanced Search

— Forum Scope —




— Match —





— Forum Options —





Minimum search word length is 3 characters - maximum search word length is 84 characters

sp_Feed Topic RSS sp_Related Related Topics sp_TopicIcon
A university education: job training or knowledge?
Topic Rating: 5 Topic Rating: 5 Topic Rating: 5 Topic Rating: 5 Topic Rating: 5 Topic Rating: 5 (1 votes) 
May 3, 2012
9:58 pm
Avatar
Member
Members
Forum Posts: 26
Member Since:
April 16, 2012
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

" hi everyone, thanks for your help in my recently essays. i tried to simplify words and sentences, though still not short. i hope this essay will have a good results and we all achieve ithe ielts test soon"

Some people think that university should be concerned with educating people so that they will have wide general knowledge and be able to consider important matters from an informed viewpoint. Other people say that universities should simply train students to do the jobs required by society and no concern themselves with broader issues. Discuss. 

One of the most concerned issues of education is the pratice of theories in lessons. Many people support the way to provide students with varied knowledge while others prefer to focus on required jobs.  In my view, each method has its own advantages and the combination of both ways is vital.

Proponents of the former view consider wide general knowledge as a way to enhance students’ productivity in working and let them choose their favourite major. To start with, it is understanding  different subjects at university that help students’ performance at job. Thanks to being well trained in their field, students can handle different problems well from social communication, and support for other colleafues in their sickness to management. Moreover, students, by viture of learning  subjects of different fields, are increasingly aware of their inner interest. Instead of being forced to follow certain jobs demanded, students have the conception of their desire and dream career.

However, opponents think that the preparation for the certain job is to ensure students’ productivity. Despite being knowledgeable of varied fields, students can still find it hard to master a career. This easily leads to their mishandling in work and reduces work effectiveness. Organisations, because of this, have to operate costly training sessions for new graduates, and feel unfairly treated by educational instituitions. Futhermore, students may grow confused and rarely figure out their own interest due to swimming in the sea of knowledge. Students in vietnam, for example, often spend much time after graduation redefining their goals; and as a result, time and students’ effort are wasted.

In summary, general knowledge is like a essential foundation for students while recognising and focusing on current job required are pratical. I presonally think that universities should provide more vocational trainings in addition to theoretical knowledge.

298 words

May 4, 2012
5:58 pm
Avatar
Member
Members
Forum Posts: 42
Member Since:
December 28, 2011
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

Hi,

Having read this essay, I think there are some improvements compared to your previous one. However, I'm trying to remove some of your words:

"In my view, each method has its own advantages and the combination of both ways is vital."

 

--> This sentences should be more specific to the topic.

 

"Proponents of the former view consider wide general knowledge as a way to enhance students’ productivity in working and let them choose their favourite major. To start with, it is understanding  different subjects at university that help students’ performance at job".


--> Proponents of general knowledge believe that understanding different university subjects helps to enhance students' productivity at work.


colleafues-->colleagues


Thanks to being well trained in their field, students can handle different problems well from social communication, and support for other colleafues in their sickness to management. Moreover, students, by viture of learning  subjects of different fields, are increasingly aware of their inner interest. 


--> Thanks to being well trained in their field, students can handle different social issues such as supporting other colleagues when necessary. Moreover, learning different subjects can also provide more opportunities for students to recognize the inner interests. 


Instead of being forced to follow certain jobs demanded, students have the conception of their desire and dream career.


--> I don't understand this sentences, maybe it needs to be clearer in meanings.


I think you last two paragraphs are good. It is clearer and more concise (maybe Mr Writefix will give you more comments on this). Keep up the good work and good luck for your test. 





May 4, 2012
8:16 pm
Avatar
Member
Members
Forum Posts: 26
Member Since:
April 16, 2012
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

Tommy Bui : thanks a lot ^^. whenever i want to simplify my sentences, i am quite afraid that my essay will lack complex structures or they are too simple. it is hard for me to fix this mistake but i believe i will overcome. 😀

May 4, 2012
8:21 pm
Avatar
Member
Members
Forum Posts: 42
Member Since:
December 28, 2011
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

The idea is to make your essay concise, so you should try to remove redundant words. If you can write a sentence in 15 words rather than 22 words and the meaning is similar, you should try to write 15 words.

 

By the way, are you studying in Hanoi or Hochiminh city?

May 4, 2012
8:29 pm
Avatar
Member
Members
Forum Posts: 26
Member Since:
April 16, 2012
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

i'm  studying in hanoi, are we in the same city? 😀

May 4, 2012
8:38 pm
Avatar
Member
Members
Forum Posts: 42
Member Since:
December 28, 2011
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

I used to study in ACET Hanoi, now I'm living in Australia.  I'm going to take the test on 26th this month.

You can post more essays here, i'll try to have a look in my free time 🙂

By the way, if you want to practice Ielts speaking, just add me on skype.

My Skype name is buituankhang.

All the best for your writing.

May 4, 2012
8:51 pm
Avatar
Member
Members
Forum Posts: 26
Member Since:
April 16, 2012
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

you make me want to go to austalia too, =)). 

i hope you will get a high score.

. now, it's 9 pm here. at your place, is it about 12pm? what is the best time for you to practice speaking?

May 4, 2012
9:11 pm
Avatar
Member
Members
Forum Posts: 42
Member Since:
December 28, 2011
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

yes, it is 12.00pm already. If you like, maybe we can practice at around 10 or 11p.m

May 4, 2012
9:18 pm
Avatar
Member
Members
Forum Posts: 26
Member Since:
April 16, 2012
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

ok! when will be the first? tomorrow? 

OMG. I feel quite nervous, your speaking ability is definitely higher than me. i'm afraid that will affect your score. =.=!

May 5, 2012
8:11 am
Avatar
Member
Members
Forum Posts: 42
Member Since:
December 28, 2011
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline
10sp_Permalink sp_Print
0

I believe that correcting mistakes from each other is one way of learning so no worries about that. I'll be available during that time and so you can text me when you see me online. Hope to see you around.

Forum Timezone: Asia/Dubai

Most Users Ever Online: 299

Currently Online:
9 Guest(s)

Currently Browsing this Page:
1 Guest(s)

Member Stats:

Guest Posters: 1

Members: 172

Moderators: 1

Admins: 2

Forum Stats:

Groups: 1

Forums: 3

Topics: 545

Posts: 2204

Moderators: Newestadmin: 0

Top
Do NOT follow this link or you will be banned from the site!