I am a new member, and I will take my first IELTS test in 11th August, I need some help to improve my writing, Of course, I will try my best to make some comments for your essays. Thanks for your comments.
In some countries young people are encouraged to work or travel for a year between finishing high school and starting university studies.
Discuss the advantages and disadvantages for young people who decide to do this
In the contemporary world, the trend that students travelling or working for a year before starting university studies is increasingly popular. This phenomenon has provoked a spirited controversy , this essay looks at both the merits and demerits.
Compelling arguments can be made that adolescents benefit from a break off academic environments. To start with, travelling or working means more participation in society activities, and these activities can definitely enrich students vision and skills . what they undergo during the journey and work will lead to survival among the intense competition in the future. Moreover, the money spent on trips and the cash they earn from hardworking will boost the awareness that life is costly and it is not easy to make a living. Last but not least, the experiences they learn outside schools are surely to be a kind of wealth throughout their entire life.
Confessedly, there are some weaknesses of being away from schools for one year. the first aspect should be considered is safety. Young students are too immature to confront the society, which is of danger, including some traps, even crimes. They may get hurt physically and psychologically, what is worse, the scars may lead to depression or pessimistic attitudes towards the society and their future. Also, the possibility that students, lacking of self-control, may find it hard to readapt to an academic environment is another worry. Because youngsters are easily to get addicted in some temptation and be influenced by some detrimental aspects in society. Even although, I believe students can handle appropriately with the help of their parents and friends.
Having deliberated the respective arguments mentioned above, despite the fact that travelling or working for a year is of worries, it seems highly advisable to encourage them to explore the world they are going to live in by themselves , before registering to universities.