Hello Alia and welcome to Writefix!

Thanks for your essay. The first thing I would suggest is to have four paragraphs only.

Paragraph 1: Rewrite the question in different words, describe the situation or problem, and say what you will do in your essay. Make sure every sentence and phrase is related to the topic. For example, instead of

alia said:

both of them has some advantages and some disadvantages , which we will illustrat in the following sentences

you could say:

Although traditional houses are more suited to the climate and quite comfortable, they can be harder to maintain and take up a lot of space. In this essay I will explain why I would prefer living in modern buildings.

Paragraph 2: Start with a topic sentence.

Modern apartments have several benefits for women.

First, ......   Second, .... Third. However they also have disadvantages.

Paragraph 3: Start with a topic sentence.

In contrast, living in a house is better for several reasons. First, .....   Another point is that....   Finally. 

Paragraph 4: Conclusion: Summarize again, using different words if possible and give your idea or opinion again.

I like your sentence

alia said:.

Eventhough , it is far from my workplace , but still I feel happy there .

I would just change it a little:

Even though it is far from my workplace, I am happy to live there because of its X, Y and Z

A couple more minor points:

• In English don't leave a space before full stops or commas - put the space AFTER only. And just use one space!
• Perhaps you could try to use fewer commas -  see how it works for you!
• Make sure you use full sentences: these are fragments

require little effort through the day .

No disturbance , no loud ,

You could change them to:

Living in a small apartment requires very little effort. The rooms are small, so they are easy to clean....

Houses are quiet. There is no disturbance and there are no loud noises to annoy you.

Thanks again!